November 19, 2011

My confession for today

This morning I was beginning to get a little anxious about all that I have going on right now, all the things that need to get done, all the errands I have to run.  It was funny because I was starting to write a list, yes a list.  Can you believe it?  I so love lists, hence the name of this blog.  I decided I needed to let you in on this. 

Lists can be really good things depending on what perspective we have about them. 

Perspective 1 - they are iron clad and once it's on the list, it's there forever and it must be accomplished come hell or high water.  We must cross all things off of this list before we do something fun. If something comes up unexpectedly and it sounds like fun, but we have this list of things we should get done today so we decide to say no to that fun, spontaneous gathering or event and miss out.

Perspective 2 - these lists are guidelines, reminders of the things going on in our lives and provide us a way to put things down so we don't forget something.  We know that we need to do most of these things but we're flexible on how, when and even who gets them done. We allow things to move on and off our list freely and don't allow them to run our lives.

There's a happy medium between these two perspectives as well. I used to live fully in perspective 1.  It absolutely drove my husband crazy.  He lives so far in perspective 2 that I don't think he has a list, except for maybe at work.  I'm sure he relies on me for that since I'm soooo good at it! 

We all have time to fit in to each day the things we want to do.  I'm really working on this in my life. I really like things a certain way, I like to plan ahead, be proactive. I like to have things cleaned up in the house, having it feeling all cozy before I think it's okay to sit down and read and relax, or play a game with the kids, or go for a run, etc, etc. But who really cares if I was supposed to do laundry today and I didn't get to it because I'd rather take the opportunity to drop it and go out to a movie, or out to dinner. The laundry fairy isn't going to come to my house while I'm gone and do it right?  I so wish there was a laundry fairy.  It's the household chore I'm the worst at.

What will you remember most?  Getting all the stuff done on your list or the fun time you had by joining in on something you didn't expect?  The memories, the time with friends, family, husband and children are much more heart warming and loving.  Your list doesn't love you or give you a smile, kiss or warm hug right? 

When looking back your first thought won't be of all the things you successfully crossed off your list each and every day, but you will first remember all the time you spent with everyone you love and the moments you had together.

I'm still learning and still practicing.  I'm getting so much better at this.  My husband, I know for sure, is so thankful for me loosening up on this.  We have a lifestyle where things pop up unexpectedly all of the time.  I've had to learn to let go and give up on the ideas that I had in my head about the day and just go with the flow.  I have to tell you, even though I sometimes went kicking and screaming, I was often most thankful that I dropped my lists and went another direction for the day. I would have missed out on a lot of fun and good times with the people in my life had I stayed home and crossed things off my list. 

I've learned that everything always gets done in one way or another.  My husband is an equal partner and I've learned to not take on everything myself.  I've learned we can delegate to one another and talk about what needs to get done and we go about and do it together.  We often decide at the last minute to call friends or family and invite them over for dinner or cocktails, etc. I still get anxious some times and run around the house hiding messes in the laundry room, throwing things in closets to have the house be presentable when they come over.  ;) Shoot! I just let out my secret.  Friends and family, when you come over next time, please don't look in drawers and closets!!  You'll figure out why Edde calls me Monica (from the Friends TV show).

No one cares what the house looks like or that I don't have a big, fancy meal planned.  The time spent together is what matters.  The laughs, the conversations, the memories.  We all will remember that rather than how clean the house was.

I'm learning and practicing every day.  I get lots of practice this time of year.  My sister, brother in-law, niece and nephew are coming in on Wednesday, staying at our home, we are hosting Thanksgiving, training for a 1/2 marathon coming up in 2 weeks, all the girls functions at school, their drama and dance class, school programs, yada yada.  All of these things I absolutely LOVE!  I can't wait to do to all of these things and have this precious time with my sister and her family.  Yes, there's a ton to do to get ready for all of these things, but what I have to remember is I WANT to do all of these things, I'm CHOOSING to do all of these things and I will do them with love and be blessed that we have the means and ability to be able to do all of this. I will revel in the memories and moments in all of these events and things going on and not on the lists!

I have lots of lists but I'm moving Beyond the Lists and enjoying all the time that we spend doing all these things, the time we spend with our loved ones.  Yes, I will always have lists.  I just have to or I'll forget to do something.  But I no longer stress over the list or put too much emphasis on it.  It's just a list.  I can cross things off, take them off the list, add to the list or decide to toss it!

Whatever happens, happens.  My focus this holiday season is not to stress or be anxious.  I will enjoy the moments and the time spent with my blessings of all the people and moments in my life. 

This is a busy time of year for all of us.  What will you remember most? Getting all the stuff done on your list or the fun time you had by joining in on something you didn't expect? The memories, the time with friends, family, spouse and children are much more full of love. When looking back on your life, your first thought won't be of all the things you successfully crossed off your list each and every day, but you will be proud of all the time you spent with everyone you love and all the fun times and moments you had together.

Love and light to all of you!  Enjoy all of your moments that are Beyond the List.




Picture courtesy of: http://www.mindpoweruntold.com/2010/06/power-of-perspective.html

1 comment:

  1. Thanks for sharing! It we really nice to hear because with the quarter coming to an end all the hw and projects to do is becoming overwhelming but this was good to be able to take another look at it and be excited for the holidays rather than feeling the stress, thanks again :)
    Nicole

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